Nashville comedian Danny Hirtler decided it was time to write a book, so he did and got it published all on his own, with one very big catch.

The catch is that nothing in the book is true.

Hirtler has a good friend named Steve. Steve loves to talk about birds, and it gets on Hirtler’s nerves.

Hirtler couldn’t take it anymore, so he wrote The Book on Birds.

“I don’t really know that much about birds though,” said Hirtler.

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He wouldn’t know a yellow-bellied sapsucker from a robin. It says so on the book cover, Things about Birds no one knows, but are probably true.

Like the bird, the whole thing’s a lark.

“So this is 72 pages of the true facts on birds, sure,” said Steve.

Steve is a know-it-all when it comes to birds, pointing out finches and falcons, grouse and geese, and calling himself a birder.

“Birding like it’s a sport. It’s not a sport and I wrote the book on birds. You can take my word for it,” said Hirtler.

Hence the book and proof you can self-publish anything.

Amazon has it listed for sale. It’s full of nonsense.

“Scientists agree the smartest bird in the world is one of those owls wearing a graduation cap and holding a rolled-up diploma,” said Hirtler.

Best friend comedy with the heart of a vulture.

“I consider myself an artist and Steve’s blood pressure is my canvas,” said Hirtler.

As far as best sellers, Hirtler’s $6 book needs a boost. He’s ranked No. 209,225 on Amazon right now, but he does crack the top 300 when it comes to books that are funny.

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